Hello...
Could anyone criticize and correct this essay for me please?
This is first draft about "Is money necessary in life?"
It maybe long, but you can read some parts of this, if you have no time.
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"Is money necessary in life?"
Money is necessary in this globalization; nevertheless, there are many things more important than it. Accordingly, money is not the summit necessity for many reasons. First of all, you can spend money in order to receive treatments, but think it twice. In some cases like terminally ill patients, love and encouragement is the best for them. Chaplain Mary E. Johnson MA, Assistant Professor of Oncology, suggested in her clinic website that you can encourage the terminally ill patients and should treat them with love like saying to them that you will listen to whatever they want to talk; you will be with them and not underestimating the value of their presence. Furthermore, there are a great deal of things that cannot be taken the place by money. I could not agree more with Oreroyo. She wrote in her blog that money can buy house but not home; money can buy position but not respect; money can buy insurance but not safety; money can buy blood but not life and so on. Last but not least, knowledge is absolutely more important than wealth. Hasnain says about the story of Imam Ali in her blog. Imam Ali says that knowledge is better because it is increasing while money is decreasing with the act; knowledge cant be stolen compared with money which can be stolen; knowledge can make the mind come to bright and the others. Overall, money is not everything and not the real happiness in our life. I think the real happiness is knowledge and goodness. We can live in this world without wealth but feel comfortable by them.
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[:Rexagon:]
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26 ม.ค. 52 23:42:06
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